We all have those "red light" foods. You know those foods? They are the ones that once we start to eat them we just can't stop. Chips, cookies, chocolate, ice cream, pizza......we all have a weakness. I encountered one of those foods today....and I must say, I was proud of my little success. :)
My "red light food" is simply that....FOOD. My younger brother and I have many memories of experimentation in the kitchen. I had my perch next to my dad at his BBQ, and I was the taste tester. Food has always been a weakness for me. I LOVE food....GOOD food. My family is full of excellent chefs, so I have always had a love of exotic and interesting food. Cooking is just as much about the creation of the meal and the presentation of it as it is sharing it with those around me. So really, I just have an issue with FOOD in general.
That being said, my wonderful husband could eat Pizza every day....for every meal just about and never complain. I LOVE pizza....not just the fast food greasy stuff that every place on the corner serves...but homemade pizza. Loaded with veggies and just a tiny bit of cheese....I love it all.
I hadn't really slept all night (I went to bed at 3am...homework and then lost track of time) and the husband's sinuses had him snoring so I was up....then the kids had to be up at 5:45am, I went back to bed at 7am when the kids went to school and I didn't get up until nearly noon! So I had brunch today. :)
Breakfast wasn't a bad choice. A couple of egg whites scrambled with 1 whole egg, tossed with some cooked barley, drizzled with a tiny bit of soy sauce and my Furikake (a Japanese rice topping that is just wonderful!). Low fat, high in protein and VERY filling. So because I had such a late breakfast, I ended up not hungry for lunch at any point in the day. THIS can set me up for an issue later with snacking because then I end up starving later.....but I handled that rather well...if I do say so myself.
I had several "cuties" (those little tangerines that I LOVE so much) and waited for the Pizza to arrive. Now everyone else in my house gets the pan pizza or the pepperoni and mushroom...or my son's favorite 5 cheese stuffed crust pizza. I always order myself a thin crust, veggie pizza with very light on the cheese....this allows me to have a little more (in number of slices if I'm just feeling greedy or gluttonous) without going over on points/calories etc.
My "red light" food that I encountered today was that Pizza....oh it tasted so good....we hadn't had pizza in a while. I'm sure I could have just had the 2 slices and been fine....but I did go and have a third....but instead of picking on myself for that, I simply decided that I was going to count the victory as a victory. I didn't have the whole pizza, I didn't let it call me in for one more slice when I was clearly FULL.
For a lot of us, "red light" foods mean we just can't EVER eat it anymore because we are afraid that we will over-indulge. But I offer you this challenge.....moderation. If you can get yourself to a point where you CAN have it...once in a while...without going overboard with it, then you count it as a victory! And if you let yourself have it, and you can't control yourself...then you count that as a victory too. It is a victory because you challenged yourself, you planned it out, challenged yourself, met that task and learned a lesson...it isn't time to consume that food yet. LOL
In short, I don't believe in fully omitting foods from my diet. The moment I tell myself I'm not "allowed" to have a food, it becomes the very thing I crave. So be honest with yourself...that is the best thing. If you have a "red light food" or a whole box of them....really ask yourself WHY? Is it because I feel like I'm not going to get any more of it? Is it because I feel like I "shouldn't" eat it? Is it not "diet food"? I am constantly reminding myself that the definition of "diet" isn't "restriction"....or "omission".....or "deprivation"...the definition of DIET is simply the nutrition I put into my body....good or bad....it is all part of my "diet". EVERYTHING is on my "diet".. I just have to monitor how much of it I consume!
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Monday, January 9, 2012
Fresh Veggie and Kielbasa Soup with Barley!
So this was today's lunch. :) Leftovers over barley.
This recipe can very easily be made with ANY kind of veggies, with or without a meat added and either served with homemade bread (which I do often) or with rice or barley!
Today I had it over barley.....
This recipe can very easily be made with ANY kind of veggies, with or without a meat added and either served with homemade bread (which I do often) or with rice or barley!
Ingredients
| 2 clove(s) garlic clove(s), minced | |
| 2 cups of sliced carrots | |
| 2 Zucchini, diced | |
| 2 cup(s) uncooked cabbage,shredded | |
| 2 cup(s) uncooked cauliflower | |
| 2 cup(s) uncooked broccoli, florets | |
| 1 medium uncooked onion(s), diced | |
| 2 nedium yellow squash, chopped 2 medium sweet red pepper(s), diced | |
| 2 rib(s) (medium) uncooked celery, diced | |
| 2 tsp thyme, fresh, chopped | |
| 6 cup(s) vegetable broth | |
| 2 Tbsp parsley, or chives, fresh, chopped | |
| 1/2 tsp table salt, or to taste | |
| 1/4 tsp black pepper, or to taste | |
| 7 serving(s) Hilshire Farms Polska Kielbasa, Cut into bite sized chunks | |
| 12 piece(s) brown italian mushroom(s) (Crimini) 2 portabella mushrooms diced | |
| 4 cup(s) water |
Instructions
- Put garlic, vegetables, thyme water and broth into a large soup pot. Cover and bring to a boil over high heat; reduce heat to low and simmer, partly covered, about 10 minutes. Stir in parsley or chives; season to taste with salt, pepper and lemon juice. Yields about 1 cup per serving.
Today I had it over barley.....
Positivity....it really is all it's cracked up to be.
So today I decided to take it upon myself to encourage a few friends that I knew were taking on new challenges and changes for their lives in 2012...much like myself. One is getting back to "her" just like I am, though in a little different way and the other has taken on the task of quitting smoking and getting healthy overall. :) So proud of them both....and it dawned on me....we as a society just don't do that anymore. We get so wrapped up in ourselves and what is going on in our lives that we don't reach out to others. We don't encourage each other...friends, family or even strangers.
I left my Facebook status with a note this morning as I ran to my morning class (just a little behind schedule) to everyone out in Facebook land. Or at least in MY little corner of it. I suggested that we use our posts, our words, our actions and our attitude towards others in a positive way. Touch another person's life with a smile, a hello, open a door...SOMETHING other than the usual ignoring glance.
It is amazing what kind of good feeling you get from being a positive person. I'm generally "perpetually perky"....as sickening as that might be for some. Sure, I have my days...and moments of sorrow and depression (just read my first post...the Ugly Truth and you will see that I'm not all sunshine, rainbows and glitter..lol) but over all, I CHOOSE every day to be happy.
That is right.....I CHOOSE to be happy. I choose not to complain or wallow in self pity for the difficult month it will be with bills because of an unforeseen emergency. I CHOOSE to just let it go and find another parking spot (even if it is all the way across the lot and my back is hurting so badly I can barely walk) because some jerk cut me off and took the one I was patiently waiting for. The truth is, it is EASY to get mad, to fume, to lash out, to give someone the finger and such.
But having that positive outlook on life, to MAKE a conscious effort to be happy and nice and giving every day really is all it is cracked up to be! I often say "What you give is all you deserve to get"...and it is very true I think. What you are willing to put out into the world, into friendships, relationships, encounters, your job etc...really is all you should expect to get back from others.
When we put out something positive, happy, kind and giving into the world or our relationships with others, we feel good. It gives us a warm fuzzy feeling...and it just puts so much more goodness into the world.
You want to change the world for the better?!? You want to make positive change in your life? You want to "fix" the hate and negativity in the world we live in?!? Be a better, happier, nicer person! Really!
Positivity really is ALL it is cracked up to be!
I left my Facebook status with a note this morning as I ran to my morning class (just a little behind schedule) to everyone out in Facebook land. Or at least in MY little corner of it. I suggested that we use our posts, our words, our actions and our attitude towards others in a positive way. Touch another person's life with a smile, a hello, open a door...SOMETHING other than the usual ignoring glance.
It is amazing what kind of good feeling you get from being a positive person. I'm generally "perpetually perky"....as sickening as that might be for some. Sure, I have my days...and moments of sorrow and depression (just read my first post...the Ugly Truth and you will see that I'm not all sunshine, rainbows and glitter..lol) but over all, I CHOOSE every day to be happy.
That is right.....I CHOOSE to be happy. I choose not to complain or wallow in self pity for the difficult month it will be with bills because of an unforeseen emergency. I CHOOSE to just let it go and find another parking spot (even if it is all the way across the lot and my back is hurting so badly I can barely walk) because some jerk cut me off and took the one I was patiently waiting for. The truth is, it is EASY to get mad, to fume, to lash out, to give someone the finger and such.
But having that positive outlook on life, to MAKE a conscious effort to be happy and nice and giving every day really is all it is cracked up to be! I often say "What you give is all you deserve to get"...and it is very true I think. What you are willing to put out into the world, into friendships, relationships, encounters, your job etc...really is all you should expect to get back from others.
When we put out something positive, happy, kind and giving into the world or our relationships with others, we feel good. It gives us a warm fuzzy feeling...and it just puts so much more goodness into the world.
You want to change the world for the better?!? You want to make positive change in your life? You want to "fix" the hate and negativity in the world we live in?!? Be a better, happier, nicer person! Really!
Positivity really is ALL it is cracked up to be!
Sunday, January 8, 2012
To Photo, or not to photo....perhaps a necessary evil.
I'm one of those lucky girls who has a very close and intimate relationship with my mom. Sure there are things I'm less than proud of and choose not to tell her about, and that is fine, she has things she doesn't tell me too...but we are close. I can always count on my mom to be there when I need her, to listen when I just need a chance to vent and whine and to give me that proverbial smack in the head when I'm just having a pity party. My mom knows me all too well.
She suggested recently that I post some photos. Now my mom is a photographer...and a darn good one at that. She was my mentor when I was young and just getting started and my biggest encourager when I decided to continue on my path with photography. She drove me to L.A. for countless calls and indulged my every desire to perform, be on stage and in front of a camera. My mom will admit, and probably be the first to say that my life has been greatly captured on film of many types, and that I have always been a ham.
But this suggestion of posting photos of myself and my progress left me anxious, insecure and quite frankly, scared sick. I've always been photogenic....but this last summer I realized something. My weight has gotten to a point where, I would much rather be behind my camera and not in front of it....ever.
My wonderful husband and I went on a cruise this summer...we had a great time. One of my best friends was able to go with us and we made some life long friends on our trip. We saw exotic locations, met friendly people, sang in the piano bar and danced the night away and soaked up the sun on the deck. I took tons of photos....but I don't like ANY of the ones taken of me. I just look at them and think....wow, I really look like that....I'm huge. I had fun, and it is obvious in my photos that I had a great time....but it is also painfully obvious that in many images I'm uncomfortable with myself.
We also are lucky enough to travel across the country and visit all my family and friends in California every year. We go to the beach and enjoy the sand and sun (though I hide under the umbrella for fear of a sunburn) every chance we get. It was on one of these days that Ben, my husband, took a photo of a gas station sign to send home to Ohio to show the price difference....he likes to show everyone that our prices in Ohio could always be higher! (We also take photos along the drive to California of all the SUPER cheap prices for fuel we pay too.) But when he took this photo (I think it was over $4 a gal at that point....ON the beach...in Laguna Beach) my backside was in the photo....NOT a flattering angle for just about ANYONE. When I saw that photo I was horribly sick to my stomach. I begged him to take it down....PLEADED with him not to post that to Facebook for all the world to see and scrutinize.
The idea of posting ANY photos of me...until I lose some of the weight, is terrifying. Then again, the whole point of this blog is to be honest with myself. To really let myself work through the horrible days and the wonderful ones...right? Why should I be so worried about a photo that shows how heavy I am, when the rest of the world can see what I look like from behind anyway? People see me every day....why are we so afraid of a photo? Is it because it makes it REAL for us? Is it because putting it up on Facebook, or on a blog is an admission of what the world sees and not what we WANT them to see?
I can tell myself I'm not that fat all I want to. I can tell myself that I look OK in what I have on, that I'm a little overweight I'm working on it. But I'm still overweight, I look terrible from behind, my face has lost its natural shape and has started to look less like ME. THAT is my reality. So I will post a photo....this is me...taken this last summer. I'm not sure EXACTLY what I weigh....but I'm pretty sure that I weigh close to what I weighed by the end of the summer when I started back on WW in August. So probably close to 237 lbs.
She suggested recently that I post some photos. Now my mom is a photographer...and a darn good one at that. She was my mentor when I was young and just getting started and my biggest encourager when I decided to continue on my path with photography. She drove me to L.A. for countless calls and indulged my every desire to perform, be on stage and in front of a camera. My mom will admit, and probably be the first to say that my life has been greatly captured on film of many types, and that I have always been a ham.
But this suggestion of posting photos of myself and my progress left me anxious, insecure and quite frankly, scared sick. I've always been photogenic....but this last summer I realized something. My weight has gotten to a point where, I would much rather be behind my camera and not in front of it....ever.
My wonderful husband and I went on a cruise this summer...we had a great time. One of my best friends was able to go with us and we made some life long friends on our trip. We saw exotic locations, met friendly people, sang in the piano bar and danced the night away and soaked up the sun on the deck. I took tons of photos....but I don't like ANY of the ones taken of me. I just look at them and think....wow, I really look like that....I'm huge. I had fun, and it is obvious in my photos that I had a great time....but it is also painfully obvious that in many images I'm uncomfortable with myself.
We also are lucky enough to travel across the country and visit all my family and friends in California every year. We go to the beach and enjoy the sand and sun (though I hide under the umbrella for fear of a sunburn) every chance we get. It was on one of these days that Ben, my husband, took a photo of a gas station sign to send home to Ohio to show the price difference....he likes to show everyone that our prices in Ohio could always be higher! (We also take photos along the drive to California of all the SUPER cheap prices for fuel we pay too.) But when he took this photo (I think it was over $4 a gal at that point....ON the beach...in Laguna Beach) my backside was in the photo....NOT a flattering angle for just about ANYONE. When I saw that photo I was horribly sick to my stomach. I begged him to take it down....PLEADED with him not to post that to Facebook for all the world to see and scrutinize.
The idea of posting ANY photos of me...until I lose some of the weight, is terrifying. Then again, the whole point of this blog is to be honest with myself. To really let myself work through the horrible days and the wonderful ones...right? Why should I be so worried about a photo that shows how heavy I am, when the rest of the world can see what I look like from behind anyway? People see me every day....why are we so afraid of a photo? Is it because it makes it REAL for us? Is it because putting it up on Facebook, or on a blog is an admission of what the world sees and not what we WANT them to see?
I can tell myself I'm not that fat all I want to. I can tell myself that I look OK in what I have on, that I'm a little overweight I'm working on it. But I'm still overweight, I look terrible from behind, my face has lost its natural shape and has started to look less like ME. THAT is my reality. So I will post a photo....this is me...taken this last summer. I'm not sure EXACTLY what I weigh....but I'm pretty sure that I weigh close to what I weighed by the end of the summer when I started back on WW in August. So probably close to 237 lbs.
This is me and my wonderful husband, Ben. Cozumel, Mexico...June 2011
This year, we are hoping to celebrate 8 years together and 4 years married with another cruise...I do NOT want to look like this again. Even more, I don't want to FEEL like this.
How can that be?!? When the measurements don't add up!
You ever have those moments where you look at a serving size and say, "um REALLY?"
Well that was my lunch. I LOVE my 98% fat free turkey chili....the can says that a serving size is 1 cup. Awesome! The can also says that there are 2 servings per can. So I heat up my chili and I'm all ready for it....and like a "good girl" I get out my 1 cup measure and the WHOLE CAN fits into the 1 cup measure!How can that be? So I take it out of the measuring cup and I RE-Measure.....and it all fits into the one cup! So this "2 Serving Can" of chili, measured out....is 1 serving!?! So it just seems impossible..... 1 cup in the whole can?!?
Well I ate the whole can....but I'm still unsure of how to honestly count it! According to my WW points calculator, 1 (1Cup) serving of this Turkey Chili with Beans is 5 points....BUT when I measured out what is 1 serving it took the whole can! If I had 2 servings then it would be 10 points.....but I only had a cup of it....which would be 5 points. :( So my dilema begins.
I also measured out 1/4 cup of reduced fat shredded cheese and put that on top (2 points)...so I either had 7 points for lunch or I had 12. :(
So here was my yummy lunch....either 7 or 12 points.... I'm still debating on what I should ACTUALLY count it as.
Well that was my lunch. I LOVE my 98% fat free turkey chili....the can says that a serving size is 1 cup. Awesome! The can also says that there are 2 servings per can. So I heat up my chili and I'm all ready for it....and like a "good girl" I get out my 1 cup measure and the WHOLE CAN fits into the 1 cup measure!How can that be? So I take it out of the measuring cup and I RE-Measure.....and it all fits into the one cup! So this "2 Serving Can" of chili, measured out....is 1 serving!?! So it just seems impossible..... 1 cup in the whole can?!?
Well I ate the whole can....but I'm still unsure of how to honestly count it! According to my WW points calculator, 1 (1Cup) serving of this Turkey Chili with Beans is 5 points....BUT when I measured out what is 1 serving it took the whole can! If I had 2 servings then it would be 10 points.....but I only had a cup of it....which would be 5 points. :( So my dilema begins.
I also measured out 1/4 cup of reduced fat shredded cheese and put that on top (2 points)...so I either had 7 points for lunch or I had 12. :(
So here was my yummy lunch....either 7 or 12 points.... I'm still debating on what I should ACTUALLY count it as.
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Weighing in....Not letting it get you down
So, like I said I decided to post twice today.
After the weigh in this morning that left me feeling a little discouraged, I decided I just had to make sure that there weren't any "extras" that I was forgetting along the way. Those Bites, Licks and Tastes that the WW leaders are always telling you about. "If you bite it, write it!"
Today, I made better choices on food, didn't snack on so many carbohydrates and managed to be very full and satisfied....and STILL had my ice cream at the end of the night...and a brownie. :)
Breakfast was Greek yogurt. (I had the store brand)
A "Cutie" tangerine
A cup of my favorite coffee all the way from California (because my sister loves me and sent it to me for Christmas this year...again) with a serving of my favorite creamer. :)
So 4 point from Breakfast isn't bad
Decided that I needed a snack so I had another tangerine mid morning for 0 points and a bottle of water.
Lunch wasn't too bad either. I had a WW frozen meal...it was Pasta with Ricotta and spinach (7 points)
and a cup of coffee with my favorite creamer again (1 point for the Creamer BTW...just make sure you MEASURE the serving and that you are truly having only ONE)
8 points for lunch....doing good.
I had some housework to do, so I managed to do 2 loads of laundry, and some basic cleaning around the house. Now, WW allows for this to be counted as "exercise"....but I decided not to count it today.
I needed a snack again when the kids got home from school so I popped a bag of popcorn. The whole bag...yes all 3 cups of it....is only 4 points....so I counted all 4 points but only had 1 cup of it...just to hold me over while I made dinner and my daughter and her friend made brownies.
I DID have a brownie with the kids and I counted it....5 points for a serving.
Dinner, I had planned for a few days. I had this recipe that I got off my WW website that I use that is only 1 point. YES 1 point per 1-cup serving of this yummy hearty soup! But I decided to add some Kielbasa to that soup because, although I would be happy with just veggies (I used to eat Lacto-Ovo), everyone else in my house wouldn't be. I decided to add Crimini mushrooms to the recipe as well and to serve it with biscuits. :) I gotta have my carbs in there. lol
I had one bowl of soup for 3 points (because the kielbasa added points to it) and 2 biscuits (for 5 points) So dinner was VERY filling, I have TONS left over (I froze a single serving container for lunch tomorrow) and I only used 8 points for my dinner! :) Success!
Homework to finish after dinner...and I tend to snack during homework...so I had the rest of the popcorn that I popped earlier and had already counted, a cup of Chai Latte Tea for 2 points and 1/2 cup of Rainbow Sherbet for 2 points.
I used my points for the day...all 33 of them. But didn't go over my weekly.
Overall I feel pretty good about today. I'm full....I don't feel deprived...but I wish that I had fit in that walk I wanted to. :( Laziness gets the better of me. So maybe tomorrow I will be able to get that in there.
I could have let the ANTs (Automatic Negative Thoughts) get the better of me and let myself snack away because "what's the point" right? But I made that decision not to. The only way to lose the weight, once and for all is to break the habits. I have a very self deprecating and self destructive pattern to me....I don't really know why I do, I guess we are all just our own worst critics. Normally I would just eat and eat and eat and try to make myself feel "better" about my failure on the scale with all the yummy goodies I make. But today, I decided not to. I can't say that I will succeed again tomorrow in the same areas, but I can congratulate myself on succeeding in it today. I did it the healthy way today...and I PLAN to do it the healthy way tomorrow.
I think that is all we really can do. Plan to do it right tomorrow. If we fail at doing it right, then we just pick back up on the next meal or snack and do it right. If we find at the end of the day that we were weak and didn't do it "right" then we just have to own that...and realize that consistency is our true flaw.
So at the end of today I can say....
I gained 2 pounds this week.
I am not giving up just because I gained 2 pounds this week.
I gained 2 pounds this week.
I'm not throwing away all the lessons learned this week because I gained 2 pounds this week.
I gained 2 pounds this week.
I'm going to allow that gain to fuel me to get through this next week...so that hopefully I don't gain 2 pounds next week. :)
Remember....if you bite it, write it. The weight is yours to lose or gain....it's going to happen one way or the other...but it should be on your terms.
After the weigh in this morning that left me feeling a little discouraged, I decided I just had to make sure that there weren't any "extras" that I was forgetting along the way. Those Bites, Licks and Tastes that the WW leaders are always telling you about. "If you bite it, write it!"
Today, I made better choices on food, didn't snack on so many carbohydrates and managed to be very full and satisfied....and STILL had my ice cream at the end of the night...and a brownie. :)
Breakfast was Greek yogurt. (I had the store brand)
A "Cutie" tangerine
A cup of my favorite coffee all the way from California (because my sister loves me and sent it to me for Christmas this year...again) with a serving of my favorite creamer. :)
So 4 point from Breakfast isn't bad
Decided that I needed a snack so I had another tangerine mid morning for 0 points and a bottle of water.
Lunch wasn't too bad either. I had a WW frozen meal...it was Pasta with Ricotta and spinach (7 points)
and a cup of coffee with my favorite creamer again (1 point for the Creamer BTW...just make sure you MEASURE the serving and that you are truly having only ONE)
8 points for lunch....doing good.
I had some housework to do, so I managed to do 2 loads of laundry, and some basic cleaning around the house. Now, WW allows for this to be counted as "exercise"....but I decided not to count it today.
I needed a snack again when the kids got home from school so I popped a bag of popcorn. The whole bag...yes all 3 cups of it....is only 4 points....so I counted all 4 points but only had 1 cup of it...just to hold me over while I made dinner and my daughter and her friend made brownies.
I DID have a brownie with the kids and I counted it....5 points for a serving.
Dinner, I had planned for a few days. I had this recipe that I got off my WW website that I use that is only 1 point. YES 1 point per 1-cup serving of this yummy hearty soup! But I decided to add some Kielbasa to that soup because, although I would be happy with just veggies (I used to eat Lacto-Ovo), everyone else in my house wouldn't be. I decided to add Crimini mushrooms to the recipe as well and to serve it with biscuits. :) I gotta have my carbs in there. lol
I had one bowl of soup for 3 points (because the kielbasa added points to it) and 2 biscuits (for 5 points) So dinner was VERY filling, I have TONS left over (I froze a single serving container for lunch tomorrow) and I only used 8 points for my dinner! :) Success!
Homework to finish after dinner...and I tend to snack during homework...so I had the rest of the popcorn that I popped earlier and had already counted, a cup of Chai Latte Tea for 2 points and 1/2 cup of Rainbow Sherbet for 2 points.
I used my points for the day...all 33 of them. But didn't go over my weekly.
Overall I feel pretty good about today. I'm full....I don't feel deprived...but I wish that I had fit in that walk I wanted to. :( Laziness gets the better of me. So maybe tomorrow I will be able to get that in there.
I could have let the ANTs (Automatic Negative Thoughts) get the better of me and let myself snack away because "what's the point" right? But I made that decision not to. The only way to lose the weight, once and for all is to break the habits. I have a very self deprecating and self destructive pattern to me....I don't really know why I do, I guess we are all just our own worst critics. Normally I would just eat and eat and eat and try to make myself feel "better" about my failure on the scale with all the yummy goodies I make. But today, I decided not to. I can't say that I will succeed again tomorrow in the same areas, but I can congratulate myself on succeeding in it today. I did it the healthy way today...and I PLAN to do it the healthy way tomorrow.
I think that is all we really can do. Plan to do it right tomorrow. If we fail at doing it right, then we just pick back up on the next meal or snack and do it right. If we find at the end of the day that we were weak and didn't do it "right" then we just have to own that...and realize that consistency is our true flaw.
So at the end of today I can say....
I gained 2 pounds this week.
I am not giving up just because I gained 2 pounds this week.
I gained 2 pounds this week.
I'm not throwing away all the lessons learned this week because I gained 2 pounds this week.
I gained 2 pounds this week.
I'm going to allow that gain to fuel me to get through this next week...so that hopefully I don't gain 2 pounds next week. :)
Remember....if you bite it, write it. The weight is yours to lose or gain....it's going to happen one way or the other...but it should be on your terms.
ANTs: .Automatic Negative Thoughts...stopping the cycle
So I decided to post early today. I will most likely post again later tonight after my housework, homework (and hopefully a walk) are all completed and the kids are off to bed...but we will see.
Today was weigh in day. NOT good results. I'm up 2 pounds. UP 2 pounds. My initial reaction was disbelief. "But I tracked it all, no matter what!" "I know I used some weekly points but I didn't go over those!" So I step back on the scale....yup, it isn't lying. Shame, depression....pouting.
In the shower the ANTs creep in. "This is a stupid goal." "Why in the world am I putting myself out there and trying to make a change when clearly I'm just going to fail?" "See....I'm going to be fat and unhappy forever...no matter what I do." ETC. But I have to stop myself and ask myself what the REAL issues are. WHY was my weight up?
OK, so here I start to pick apart my week.
I tracked...that's a start. But I tracked AFTER I ate or drank something rather than before I made the choice to have it. So I can change that this week....but that alone isn't going to fix the gain.
I'm on medications....which can cause weight gain (temporary) so I need to take that into consideration but not convince myself that THAT is the reason it is up. (Let's face it....any chance we get to blame weight gain on something out of our control we all do it.) (The Ugly truth of medications, the TMI truth about pain medications in particular...is that they can make things, shall I say, less than regular. Which in turn CAN make a scale weigh you just a little higher.) So, maybe that has something to do with my weight being up...maybe not....but I will log that fact and keep in mind that I need to control the things I can right now, and medication isn't one of them...yet.
Water....I drink water....I like it. But have I really been drinking as much as I should be? No. I need to be drinking 8 glasses of water a day. Yes yes yes "they" have changed it to 6 (don't ask me why... I think it is a bunch of crap to be honest) but I find that I have lost more weight when I drank more water....so I need to get a new water bottle (one with one of those built in filter systems so I have no reason to buy bottled water while out and about). So that goes on the list of things to change this week.
Exercise...to be honest, I just haven't done it. I need to. In order to get healthy and to complete that half marathon I need to get to that....so that is a must. But at the same time, I'm under Dr order to "take it easy" and do "minimal walking" to keep from aggravating the pain and swelling. But I can't really do that and achieve my goals. So today, I start some exercise. Not major training yet, but some. It's nice out today....41 degrees and feels nice out..a cold breeze but nothing Ben's sweatshirt won't take care of. :) So either that, or I'll do some Wii Fit or get on the stationary bike. I just need to move my body.
So here I sit, at 1 pm in the afternoon, debating lunch....trying to keep from allowing those ANTs to creep up and infect my mind, setting me off on the wrong foot for the week. Breakfast was healthy and well rounded....so lunch should be too. :)
In the end, those Automatic Negative Thoughts are mine to make and mine to fix. As the kind of person who tries to focus on the positive so much in my life, and honestly, being HAPPY and PERKY every day is a CHOICE I make.... I really don't do that when it comes to myself and my self esteem. I allow the negativity to be internal while the positivity is external....time to stop that cycle too.
Yet another lesson I have to learn.
Today was weigh in day. NOT good results. I'm up 2 pounds. UP 2 pounds. My initial reaction was disbelief. "But I tracked it all, no matter what!" "I know I used some weekly points but I didn't go over those!" So I step back on the scale....yup, it isn't lying. Shame, depression....pouting.
In the shower the ANTs creep in. "This is a stupid goal." "Why in the world am I putting myself out there and trying to make a change when clearly I'm just going to fail?" "See....I'm going to be fat and unhappy forever...no matter what I do." ETC. But I have to stop myself and ask myself what the REAL issues are. WHY was my weight up?
OK, so here I start to pick apart my week.
I tracked...that's a start. But I tracked AFTER I ate or drank something rather than before I made the choice to have it. So I can change that this week....but that alone isn't going to fix the gain.
I'm on medications....which can cause weight gain (temporary) so I need to take that into consideration but not convince myself that THAT is the reason it is up. (Let's face it....any chance we get to blame weight gain on something out of our control we all do it.) (The Ugly truth of medications, the TMI truth about pain medications in particular...is that they can make things, shall I say, less than regular. Which in turn CAN make a scale weigh you just a little higher.) So, maybe that has something to do with my weight being up...maybe not....but I will log that fact and keep in mind that I need to control the things I can right now, and medication isn't one of them...yet.
Water....I drink water....I like it. But have I really been drinking as much as I should be? No. I need to be drinking 8 glasses of water a day. Yes yes yes "they" have changed it to 6 (don't ask me why... I think it is a bunch of crap to be honest) but I find that I have lost more weight when I drank more water....so I need to get a new water bottle (one with one of those built in filter systems so I have no reason to buy bottled water while out and about). So that goes on the list of things to change this week.
Exercise...to be honest, I just haven't done it. I need to. In order to get healthy and to complete that half marathon I need to get to that....so that is a must. But at the same time, I'm under Dr order to "take it easy" and do "minimal walking" to keep from aggravating the pain and swelling. But I can't really do that and achieve my goals. So today, I start some exercise. Not major training yet, but some. It's nice out today....41 degrees and feels nice out..a cold breeze but nothing Ben's sweatshirt won't take care of. :) So either that, or I'll do some Wii Fit or get on the stationary bike. I just need to move my body.
So here I sit, at 1 pm in the afternoon, debating lunch....trying to keep from allowing those ANTs to creep up and infect my mind, setting me off on the wrong foot for the week. Breakfast was healthy and well rounded....so lunch should be too. :)
In the end, those Automatic Negative Thoughts are mine to make and mine to fix. As the kind of person who tries to focus on the positive so much in my life, and honestly, being HAPPY and PERKY every day is a CHOICE I make.... I really don't do that when it comes to myself and my self esteem. I allow the negativity to be internal while the positivity is external....time to stop that cycle too.
Yet another lesson I have to learn.
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